Pros and Cons of psychotherapy

As the value of mental/emotional well-being increasingly resonates with the general public, more people are considering using therapy to work on relationship issues, resolve grief/losses/trauma, obtain emotional / inner growth, achieve ownership in important decisions, etc.

Like many of my previous clients reported, they found THEIR answer to the long-held questions that posed challenges in their lives.

Yes, they found the answer that truly belongs to them, even though it may sound like someone else’s choice or resemble one of the many options available.

For those who have experienced therapy in one way or another, they know the above list of benefits is not at all exhausted.

Hmm……Sounds good.

Well, many intelligent prospective clients may ask, “What is the catch?”

A million-dollar question, isn’t it?

Anyway, no one can get something good for nothing.

Nowadays, many therapists, however diverse their clinical training is, agree that psychotherapy / counseling is an investment into yourself.

Why?

Let’s start from financial commitment.

Fees for therapy ranges vary greatly. Copay, co-insurance, deductible and self-pay are not foreign to many who had used medical services to certain extend. Payment is expected when service is rendered. This holds true in both medical clinics and therapy offices.  

Second is your time commitment.

In order to reap the optimal benefits from psychotherapy services, weekly sessions should be held and fit into your schedule. For some cases, more than once a week may be warranted to expedite stabilization or uproot some deeply held issues/ concerns.

The last but not the least, is investment of emotional energy.

For whatever issues you are about to confront, with therapists using various approaches, emotional energy had to be gathered to sit with vulnerable feelings associated with something that had been swept under the rug.

Sadness, anger, depression, helplessness, hopelessness, jealousy, hurt, shame, guilt……the surge of these feelings can be very overwhelming at times especially certain topics were touched upon.

Without dedication to treatment on the part of clients, there is no way for even the most well-trained therapist to help create miracles.

In a sense, it is the client’s willingness to sit with discomfort in the face of emotions that makes treatment success possible.

Given the above mentioned pros and cons of therapy services, therapy is quite a bumpy ride for the client and the therapist.

So, are YOU, my client, ready for your journey in treatment?

2017©Minjun Wang, LPCC 2970  All rights reserved.

3 Reasons Why You Shouldn’t Befriend Your Therapist(s)

Turning your therapist into a personal friend…..

Being listened to sincerely and respectfully when you feel confessional ……

Uh, we are all intrigued by such a picture, right?

Many clients, especially those with little exposure to positive interpersonal interaction outside therapy, are likely to express such an invitation to their therapists due to a sense of loss brought up by upcoming termination.  

Nothing can be further exemplary of this dynamic than a comment I heard, “Christine, I hope that I can go out with my counselor for coffee from time to time when I am done here.”

It’s understandable and natural. Anyway, who wants to let go of warmth, respect and patience from therapists?

So, what’s wrong with befriending your therapist?

Because it is unfair for YOU, the client.

Why????

First, there is imbalance between you and your therapist as to the amount of personal information shared and exchanged.  

It’s true that therapists are (should be) as supportive, warm, accepting and respectful as your best friends. However, your therapist(s) DON’T reciprocate vulnerable information with you or if they did, they did it far less than your friend.

Ever wondered why?

Because countless seasoned therapists believe that their self-disclosure tends to shift the focus from clients to themselves. It is ok ONLY when it helps YOU achieve breakthrough in treatment.

Simply put, how fair is it for you to know nothing about your friend?

Second, the power-differential is inherent in the therapist-client relationship.

By this I mean, due to the nature of counseling relationship, therapists reserve the right of conducting evaluation, assessment and treatment as a professional. Clients are the ones on the receiving end when these activities take place.

Not agreed?

For those who went through residential treatment programs, they know that receiving a write-up which leads to disciplinary actions imposed on by staff can be most illustrative of this argument.  

So, how fair is it to befriend someone that has more power over you than you over him/her?

Third, friendship with clients will compromise a therapist’s capacity to maintain clinical objectivity.

What clearly sets friendship and therapy apart is that therapist will do their due diligence to prevent their emotional reaction from interfering with course of treatment. They will seek clinical/peer supervision or obtain necessary consultation when warranted.

Friendship, however, featured by emotional investment, easily clouds the therapist’s judgment. When that happens, his/her ability to provide quality care is questionable.

Again, how fair is it for you to settle for less when you deserve the best?

Of course, the list for the reasons can go on and on.

To sum up, turning your therapists to friends, no matter how tempting, is highly discouraged given many potential harms it can cause you and your treatment/recovery.

What can we do with this? Actually, I would like borrow another therapist’s input, “The best gift I can give you as your therapist is to stay as your therapist.”

Yes, my client, YOU don’t have to lose me, your therapist, to get a friend.

What do you think? 

2017©Minjun Wang, LPCC 2970  All rights reserved.